Welcoming a new family member and time for rest and recharge.

Delight Flower Farm, photo by Tay Jules Photography.

I am heading into the final few months of growing a new family member alongside my growing bakery. I will not lie, it’s been a bit of a mindfuck to really see momentum building with Tooth Butter Bakery since the holidays while also planning to go dormant soon to soak in this next round of newborn in our family. The call towards motherhood is strong in me and I am beyond excited about this next journey but I have been exceptionally proud of the business I am building and have admittedly had sad moments deciding how to part with it for now.

Small business owners have autonomy. A phrase I have hashed out in several conversations lately. Deeply medicinal conversations, if we have had one, thank you. It’s empowering to get to decide how to conduct your business. It’s also really hard and vulnerable. I’m grateful to be able to say “I am taking a break” but at the same time I am sooo full of ideas and dreams for what this bakery can become and have to remind myself over and over that this CAN (and arguably should) move slow. For now, I’m planning to take some drastic measures to allow myself a clean slate for hopefully launching this community supported bakery into its next phase down the line. I am leaving lots of room for that to evolve beyond what my imagination currently has created.

I have found it means a whole lot to me to be one of the “bread bakers” for my community. I know many families personally that eat my bread as part of their weekly sustenance. It is also a great honor to create thoughtful, balanced pastries with amazing local produce and organic grains, and see the excitement that is returned from y’all. I have found work for myself that feels deeply aligned and passion-forward. I am proud, I am grateful, and I am committed to paving a path forward that continues to make me and you feel this way.

Elm City Coffee, photo by Tay Jules Photography.

Tender is the best word I can use to describe how I am holding together in this season of life. I am peaceful, eyes and heart open to the world around me. Trying to keep myself present, stay tapped into my body. This has lead to a lot of emotions, thankfully, many grounded intuitions have come to the forefront and guided my decision making.

I have seen many hardships recently, both localized within my circle of humans, and outward amongst this big world of humans. Facing it all with a growing child and a new one on the way can be really heavy and that responsibility calls me in, take care of self, take care of family, take care of others. I am as honed in as ever on baking though. My calling has been to feed others. I am hopeful to explore what it really means to me to “feed others” while I am away from baking for my business. What does it look like long-term? How is it going to be more sustainable for self and others? Will it expand? Can it?

Nothing like a universe power move to bring a new life into the equation right when I start to think I’ve got it all figured out. I am so grateful to be learning and growing in this community, running a bakery supported by this community. The graciousness keeps me going.

From a baker’s perspective, we are now over the hump of true holiday season. Thanksgiving through Valentine’s day. I know many bakeries take a substantial break in January, I definitely rested, but then production ramps up tenfold for love day and it kind of feels like you’re right back in it. I am not far off from being eight months pregnant. My body has been getting it done, but as each week passes, I certainly feel as if I am thriving less and less hawking tubs of dough around, that’s for damn. A good reminder to SLOWWWW down soon.

So I will be.

My last Pantry Bread One-Off bake is slated for March 5th. Pre-orders go live at my HotPlate this Friday, 10am. Bread and granola.

I am also scheming what I will call “Freezer Stash Pantry Bread Bakes” to hopefully act as a way for some of you to stash some bread for my time away. I have pulled off nearly three years of baking bread for y’all by a lot of devoted regulars and much word of mouth, the support can knock me over sometimes. Thinking about not baking bread regularly for you has genuinely brought on emotions I am still processing. It brings me joy to think about filling your freezers with some Tooth Butter goodies before I head off into baby land! I plan to start these ASAP, likely the week following the last Pantry Bread. Ordering will still take place on my HotPlate (live every Friday), though these bakes will work a bit differently. The goal is to create the necessary logistical/production tweaks to allow more easeful and efficient baking on my body. Plan right now is… two bakes a week, one on Wednesday and one on Friday. One single type of bread each week, one mixer round drastically eases up my workflow. Pick-ups at Elm City Coffee (where my kitchen is located) in downtown Urbana so I don’t have to transport bread very far. The coffee shop is open until 5 pm each day and I will aim to have bread out by noon on bake days so that you can hopefully find a pocket in there to grab your bread. I am hoping to do three weeks of this so I can cover the three fan-favorites, Bmilk Sammy Loaf, Seedy Porridge Bread, and Spelt English Muffins, scheduled to bake in this order as well. Pending my purposefully dwindling ingredient supply, I will try to throw some Fermented Oat Granola and Every Little Thing cookies into the mix.

I have one more fun bake sneakily stashed in my back pocket for now. It's on my list of things to do if I continue feeling GUHD towards true spring time. Stay tuned.

Still baking every Friday for Elm City Coffee too, small pastry offering out on their counter by mid-morning, usually lasts through the weekend.

Cloud Mountain Kombucha, photo by Tay Jules Photography

Sharing a few images throughout this newsletter from Chase and I’s wedding back in August. Lovingly taken by Tay Jules Photography. We got them back and I was overjoyed to see the way Taylor captured our “community.” So many friends here in town came together that day to create an easeful, love and laughter-filled celebration. This is the kind of “caring for others” I hope to take part in over and over again.