The Way Things Are Now

We welcomed a new family member in early May, a week before big bros’ third birthday. Baby Russell is the new guy on the block and we are deeply enamored by him. He was named after a true hero in our eyes and continues to show us all the ways his little spirit has a large amount of magic in it. Life with two littles is the ride of a lifetime, baby. I am continuously amazed at how full my days are right now. It’s taken me a little over three weeks to get this newsletter done.

Photo by Tay Jules Photography, 2026

I have had many moments with new baby Russ where I felt the need to go down memory lane with baby Malc photos at the same milestones. Of course, I start down rabbit holes of photo viewing when this happens and then I find myself all mixed up in baking photos. The early days of Tooth Butter, photos making it very obvious I was balancing new motherhood and starting a business at home. Malc was also a total meatball and for those of you that were there for those early pop-ups, I’m sure you remember him slapping around at Cloud Mountain as he learned to crawl around his bucha buddies.

And while I’m there, deep into my screen time, A LOT of hovering over photos of last year too. The jump from a cottage bakery to a commercial bakery. The realization that we were also jumping from a family of three to four. Documentation of the work it all entailed and the work I created in my bakery when it was all done (with a baby Russ in utero!) Looking at these photos has me juggling feelings of deep pride and admittedly, some sadness. Both over the growing babies and the baking. Also reminds me that it actually happened. It was a really sweet pocket of time.

The glory days in the commercial bakespace, sourdough english muffin slingin’.

It’s a lot to do all of the things you love. There’s hardly enough time in a day. I’m not one to half ass much so I usually find myself in burnout a lot quicker than I would like to. This second baby has humbled me and shown me that life is gonna tell me how it is for a while. Arguably, forever lol. I’m trying really hard to soak up the memorable moments because it feels like we are in a time warp tunnel all the same. 

Our newest baby is three months old. Our oldest is three and heading off to preschool in a few weeks. Chase is working full time on a job site on campus, thankfully only minutes away from home. I am here at home, holding it down, managing schedules and trying to feed myself adequately.

I still don’t have any clue how I am going to return to work. 

I dipped my toes back in the water at five and six weeks postpartum to bake and provide food for two dear friends on their wedding days. It was great fun, but it was also a workout on my healing body and transitioning mind. It showed me that I am not ready to return full steam ahead, and for that lesson, I am grateful.

I know I told many of you that I wasn’t going to rush back in, I was going to enjoy this season of full surrender to motherhood. Truth is, I miss baking. I miss interacting with our community as Tooth Butter. I miss baking bread, the sweetness of knowing I was providing weekly nourishment to your families. And I see a need for nourishing food in our community in more ways than one. So I am making some small plans to return in various ways, I am writing down every single idea I have even if it feels like it might not go anywhere. I’ve got some bread workshops (and a whole grain pie dough workshop!) lined up at the Allerton Folk School this fall. I’ll have more on the lineup by winter time, I’m sure. I’m considering opening my books up to special orders and custom cakes soonish*. And in typical Hannah fashion, I be scheming with other small businesses on how we can get into some shenanigans together with good food. I likely won’t be as expressive this holiday season, I actually do want to spend that mostly with family.

Unhinged wedding cake this summer for some dear friends. Florals from Delight Flower Farm.

But for real, I don’t know what this all looks like yet. And I am ok with that. I ultimately am going to keep moving as slow as I can (this is a reminder to self, once again, to slowwww down) so this great return can be even more intentional than the last time. It feels more important than ever to integrate my family and my creative work in a healthy, sustainable balance. Not gonna sugar coat it, the landscape to run a small food business ain’t super forgiving right now either. So when I say that I have no idea what this all looks like yet, that is what I am talking about. I have a dreamy vision of how this all could go, of course I have a vision, but is it feasible? Idk.

My commercial kitchen lease ended the month Russell was born. It was good universe timing for a clean slate and easeful entrance into maternity leave. Some lovely folks have moved in and are using my ovens for the time being, so grateful they were ready to take the leap with their business and so proud of them (it’s Everyday Feast, find em at the farmer’s markets!) I re-upped my cottage permit a few days ago, wanted to have it in my back pocket for when I inevitably take a creative idea too far and it becomes a reality…

One day at a time for now, annual summer trip up North tomorrow is the current excitement. Going to celebrate one year of marriage and probably shed a few cathartic tears in Lake Michigan over what a year it has been. When we return, I have my focus set on a few special orders I have said yes to for the Fall and my baking workshops. Baking lots of bread behind the scenes so my hands don’t get rusty and always open to have a conversation on how we could do great things together through food!

So I guess I am kind of back? Baker-at-large.

*I have been working on updating this website so it will reflect my current situation. It’s not quite there yet so don’t go blowing up my email with special order requests, there will be structure to that if and when it happens. As Amy/Girl With Pie in Peoria says, also in a postpartum season of her life, “only baking for the homies right now.”